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Jake Hyuzak [Complete]

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Jake
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Fifth year Anniversary Combination Topic Starter
« Reply #15 on: April 04, 2010, 08:26:36 am »

Really people? Does it matter anymore? I've already been accepted....seriously...

Also, I'm sorry Red for saying those hurtful things. After re-reading my passage, I noticed you are correct. I don't know if I can find those 24 areas, but I blame that on my grammer, and FireFox for not fixing it.

Also, that was a diffrence between Twilli and I. I apologize.
« Last Edit: April 04, 2010, 08:28:18 am by Jake » Report Spam   Logged

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« Reply #16 on: April 04, 2010, 10:01:37 am »

That's okay, Jake. After all, when you get told the rules of creative writing and put them to use in your own RP, it makes life a lot easier. Even if Twilli still hates your very self, at least he can't argue that you're getting better at writing. I think my advice (because you've had enough criticism) is this; Re-read each paragraph instead of reading the whole thing through again, so you can add to those paragraphs, thus improving the whole piece altogether more or less. Oh, and happy Easter. :3
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Biography

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Nickname: Tails
Gender: Female; Personality: Timid
Ability: ~Synchronize~, Holding: Oran Berry
Happiness: 250, Level: 14; Experience: 12.5/14
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Nidoran♂
Nickname: Toxin
Gender: Male, Personality: Timid
Ability: ~Poison Point~, ~Rivalry~ Holding: Rawst Berry
Happiness: 210, Level: 15, Experience: 8/15
Double Kick
Peck
Focus Energy
Poison Sting

 Skorupi
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 Gender: Male, Personality: Brave
 Ability: ~Battle Armour~, ~Sniper~, Holding: N/A
 Happiness: 80, Level: 5, Experience: 0/5
Bite
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